France Elevates its Security Level

Moderators: Elvis, DrVolin, Jeff

France Elevates its Security Level

Postby eric144 » Sat Nov 12, 2005 6:23 pm

<br> As many are aware, the French government recently announced a <br> raise in its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide". The normal <br> level is "General Arrogance", and the only two higher levels in <br> France are "Surrender" and "Collaborate". The rise was <br> precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country's military capability. <br> <br> It's not only the French that are on a heightened level of alert: Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout loudly and excitedly" to "Elaborate military posturing". Two more levels remain, "Ineffective combat operations" and "Change sides". <br> <br> The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdain" to <br> "Dress in uniform and sing marching songs". They have two higher levels: "Invade a neighbour" and "Lose". <br> <br> Seeing this reaction in continental Europe the Americans have gone from "Isolationism" to "Find another oil-rich nation for regime change". Their remaining higher alert states are "Attack random countries (ideally those without any credible military)" and "Beg the British for help". <br> <br> The British are also feeling the pinch in relation to recent <br> bombings and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to <br> "Peeved". Soon though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross". Londoners have not been "A Bit Cross" since the Blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "Bloody Nuisance". The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the Great Fire of 1666. <br> <p></p><i></i>
eric144
 
Posts: 279
Joined: Tue Sep 20, 2005 6:16 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

I needed a good laugh.

Postby banned » Sat Nov 12, 2005 9:23 pm

UnPC joke time, sensitive listeners cover yer ears:<br><br>Did you see the listing on eBay for a shipment of French Army rifles?<br><br>"Dropped once. Never fired."<br><br>And Italian tanks have three reverse gears--and one forward, in case they're attacked from behind.<br><br>A German's idea of a 'inviting you over for a good time' is making you dig a hole then shooting you so you fall in it.<br><br>Who's next? Oh, the Brits: <br><br>Two Frenchman were walking along the shore when they saw a naked woman bobbing in the surf. When they rescued her she was so gorgeous one of them hopped on top of her and started humping away. The other one said "But what are you dooeeng? She ees dead!" The first one said "Sacre bleu, sorree, I tought she was Eengleesh."<br><br>Sorry for the bad accent transcription <!--EZCODE EMOTICON START :lol --><img src=http://www.ezboard.com/images/emoticons/laugh.gif ALT=":lol"><!--EZCODE EMOTICON END--> <p></p><i></i>
banned
 
Posts: 912
Joined: Sun Oct 02, 2005 5:18 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

"Democracy R Us"

Postby moustache » Sat Nov 12, 2005 9:31 pm

More butch is what is needed............<br><br>Few hundred thousand Iraqis dying for democracy. sure you are from the coffins.<br><br>A few thousand Americans who don,t matter.<br><br>No social benefit analysis in government spending.<br><br>Bankrupt country.<br><br>Divide and Rule............<br><br>Easily done ........ <p></p><i></i>
moustache
 
Posts: 12
Joined: Mon Nov 07, 2005 10:53 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)


Return to Other

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests