A Toast to Banned and Disappeared Posters

[barracuda]

Give me a little more to go on...

I don't want to discuss it much, because it's so ugly on the face of it. But I will point out a few things about that thread:

- The timing of the attack that shut down the board is the context.

- And then, it's hard not to notice the freewheeling, unbridled hatred espoused by the anonymous posters on the thread, not just of me, but of the forum in general.

- The remarks at the bottom of the page by c2w are telling. A few posters here have noticed that she has stopped participating on the board. A very few have commented upon it. I think her remarks, especially those of 9/13/2010 07:55:00 PM pretty obviously have a bearing on why this is the case, and her final post of 9/14 on the forum demonstrates, I think, the reality of her feelings on the matter.

Also, I have a question, does the no sock puppet rule apply to mods and admin as well?

Yep.

By the way - a toast to c2w?. You are missed.

[Project Willow]

By the way - a toast to c2w?. You are missed.

I thought she was just taking another break, but she's really gone.
Loves and kisses c2w, wherever you are.

[Free]

Project Willow wrote:
Yeah, there are remedies, like dealing IN GOOD FAITH and with respect to Jeff and the mods here, and to me too.

Writing in all caps is the equivalent of shouting. Your writing is tinged with anger and laced with accusations. If you want to push people around, this is the way to go. If you want to co-operate and work with others, though, it's not so good.

You know who I am, my real name and my reputation in the community is attached to my user name here. I haven't seen one of the posters you're trying to defend act in good faith that way. As far as I know not a single one of them has approached leadership here or me or anyone with any real information about themselves, yet you trumpet their victimhood.

You've made the choice to be public by linking your real name with your screen name. I respect you for that, but, due to type of work or other concerns, not everyone can or wants to be public on a forum like this and their choice should also be respected.

Besides, You know Cordelia's real name and address because of the art show. Cordelia has written to Jeff but received no response (how he keeps up with all this is beyond me).and he's been in contact with Delta Dawn's son about the issue of them posting from the same IP.

I am so tired of this BS bully campaign

Well I'm tired of survivors who present themselves as advocates and activists around survivor issues then make a habit of lashing out and hurting the very people they say they want to help.

Do you want me to show a real example of bullying? It's from last fall when that whole cadre joined, all within a week of each other and their first requests were to be a part of the art show I was organizing. Try these links: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=25544&p=293564#p293564 and here: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=25544&p=293667#p293667 Their tag-teamed attack on me continued but they've since deleted those posts of curse.

I reread the thread you referenced and it only reinforced my belief that this whole mess is based on misunderstandings, ego and hot air. The posters in question all joined around the same time because they all knew each other, what's so hard to understand about that?

And Brigit and her writing sounded nothing like Bridge it, the obnoxious troll who was obviously a man. The only thing they had in common was a similar screen name, and I seriously doubt that even a low wattage troll like Bridge it would come back with the screen name Brigit.

The deleted posts were deleted because I had made a comment about security issues and called into question the wisdom of letting it all hang out on a public site like this, not because of anything to do with you.

In fact, at the time this conflict took place, because of the light of suspicion that had been shone on them, I was paying close attention to their postings. What I perceived was that they were hapless survivors looking for support and camaraderie. If you or Jeff or anyone has some proof otherwise, why don't you just come out with it?

[barracuda]

What exactly are you looking for, Free, besides an argument? It's as if you're insisting that Willow apologize for something to someone. Are Delta Dawn and Cordelia unable to speak for themselves? Because it seems as if you're advocating for them simply in order to pick a fight.

Jeff made a call on filedactivity's status, and he has explained it to you already. There is certainly nothing Willow can do about it. If you have personal issues with her, take it up via pm. This thread is about toasting and razzing and remembering fondly and not so fondly members who are not with us at the moment, not about your personal recriminations with Willow, or issues within the survivor contigent of the forum. I suggest you try banging on the bar over at The Saloon, maybe.

[Free]

Barracuda wrote:
What exactly are you looking for, Free, besides an argument?

The whole conversation is about, as Jeff said in a previous post - board health. I'm not sure what the solution is, but It's hard for me to stand by and witness the stifling of peoples voices, especially other survivors.

It's as if you're insisting that Willow apologize for something to someone. Are Delta Dawn and Cordelia unable to speak for themselves? Because it seems as if you're advocating for them simply in order to pick a fight.

So what you're saying is that when Willow posts angry, accusatory and often untrue things about others it's fine, but if they respond they are picking a fight?

Jeff made a call on filedactivity's status, and he has explained it to you already. There is certainly nothing Willow can do about it. If you have personal issues with her, take it up via pm.

If she wants to pm me I will talk with her.

This thread is about toasting and razzing and remembering fondly and not so fondly members who are not with us at the moment, not about your personal recriminations with Willow, or issues within the survivor contigent of the forum.

So you define the parameters of what can be discussed here and I should shut up and move along...

[barracuda]

Yep. This is my thread, and I think you're off-topic.

[Free]

These are important issues, and it's very unmoderater-like of you to shut down instead of facilitate.

[barracuda]

Look, Free - you seem interested in continuing the conversation begun by filedactivity here because it's an open thread. But Jeff locked filedactivity's thread for a reason which seemed very clear. If you'd like to start a thread on the health of the board, it might turn out interesting. But this really isn't that thread.

My moderator's senses are tingling me that you wanna call out Willow on her behaviour. But I don't really want to encourage that kind of personal he-said, she-said discussion here, particularly on my little lounge thread, and clearly neither does Jeff.

Have you considered speaking with Delta Dawn and Cordelia about returning to the board? That may, in the end, be more profitable than personal acrimony.

So, in short, my facillitation of your problem here is a threefold recommendation:

- pm Willow yourself - don't wait for her - and attempt a reconciliation. If she doesn't reply, you may have to come to terms with a non-resolution of this particular facet of the issue.

- start a new thread on the health of the board and see what the general forum thinks. But calling out other members is not encouraged.

- encourage DD and Cordelia to return, and perhaps everyone can let bygones be bygones, or we can move on to issues less centered around personalities and more on research and possibilities.

I hope that's helpful. I really don't want to stifle your need for answers on these issues, but I don't think the thrust of this particular thread is properly centered on their resolution. I encourage you to avoid an argumentative stance, and move towards something more concilatory and forgiving if you wish for the core issues of your interests to remain front and center rather than sidelined by in-fighting. Regroup.

[Cordelia]

Cuda, along with upbraiding Free for addressing injustices and profoundly inaccurate accusations on this board, you also indirectly challenged me to respond. So, before returning your thread to your OP intention, I’ll speak for myself.

Project Willow wrote: "Yeah, there are remedies, like dealing IN GOOD FAITH and with respect to Jeff and the mods here, and to me too. You know who I am, my real name and my reputation in the community is attached to my user name here. I haven't seen one of the posters you're trying to defend act in good faith that way. As far as I know not a single one of them has approached leadership here or me or anyone with any real information about themselves, yet you trumpet their victimhood."

I’m sure you’re not really encouraging survivors, or anyone, to post their real names or identifying information on a public board. But, as Free already pointed out, you know, through the art show, very well that I am who I say I am. (And, having once managed a gallery, I know the effort it takes to curate a group show and I admired your competence & professionalism; I tried to convey to you my appreciation for your work on the show.)


Project Willow wrote: "I am so tired of this BS bully campaign. Do you want me to show a real example of bullying? It's from last fall when that whole cadre joined, all within a week of each other and their first requests were to be a part of the art show I was organizing. Try these links: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=25544&p=293564#p293564 and here: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=25544&p=293667#p293667"

As addressed almost a year ago on this board, I entered RI awkwardly at best, and, feeling provoked & un-welcomed, combatively at worst, and I apologized. The suspicions about me and Brigit were addressed at length and, I thought, laid to rest. I guess I was wrong. To label me, Brigit and Delta Dawn (and, by extension, her son) a ‘cadre’ is not only false but it fans the flames of our imaginary harassment and persecution of you.


Project Willow wrote: "Their tag-teamed attack on me continued but they've since deleted those posts of curse."

There were no deleted ‘tag-teamed attacks’. The deleted posts had nothing whatsoever to do with you; again, as Free already stated, after she (rightly) challenged the wisdom of posting potentially sensitive, personal experiences and after some consideration, I edited some posts and deleted others. Brigit later deleted hers, for, as I recall, much the same reason, then she pretty much exited the board.


Project Willow wrote: "I assert, especially after DD's last posting in which she commented that DID was a hoax."

Please provide a link because I didn’t see that post either. Knowing DD as I do, I’m certain she doesn’t consider DID a ‘hoax’.

You know I’m real and I know DD and Filedactivity are real people, not trolls nor sockpuppets. (And yes, DD deserves an apology, certainly, for the hostile & inflammatory imagery directed at her on page 25 & 27 of The Saloon.)

What a shame that not only are MC survivors disbelieved, discredited and marginalized, but so are their children, many of whom are also deeply impacted.
On the other hand, I don’t, and hope they don’t, take it personally. RI can’t be a safe venue for survivors. No place is, IMHO.

Cordelia

[barracuda]

RI can’t be a safe venue for survivors. No place is, IMHO.

Fair enough. While accepting that this may be the case, I hope you can continue to find some usefulness in the forum, and offer your commentary when the feeling strikes you.

[Project Willow]

Sorry b., I will post this in GD if necessary.

One problem Cordelia, is that I have links to back up my assertions, and they prove you and Free wrong.

I’m sure you’re not really encouraging survivors, or anyone, to post their real names or identifying information on a public board. But, as Free already pointed out, you know, through the art show, very well that I am who I say I am.

No, actually I have a name and an address associated with your user name, but anyone can set that stuff up with a friend or associate. I have not met you in person. Given that over the last 9 months I've been slandered, blatantly followed, and threatened because of my work with and on behalf of survivors in the real world, it is not out of the realm of possibility that you are not who you say you are.

Project Willow wrote: "I am so tired of this BS bully campaign. Do you want me to show a real example of bullying? It's from last fall when that whole cadre joined, all within a week of each other and their first requests were to be a part of the art show I was organizing. Try these links: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=25544&p=293564#p293564 and here: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=25544&p=293667#p293667"

As addressed almost a year ago on this board, I entered RI awkwardly at best, and, feeling provoked & un-welcomed, combatively at worst, and I apologized. The suspicions about me and Brigit were addressed at length and, I thought, laid to rest. I guess I was wrong. To label me, Brigit and Delta Dawn (and, by extension, her son) a ‘cadre’ is not only false but it fans the flames of our imaginary harassment and persecution of you.

Jeff banned one member for what you're describing as imaginary, Cordelia, it's incredibly disrespectful. One RI troll described a method of forum disruption, and another one bragged about using it. The group of you fit that model and the one who bragged about using it has had this board squarely in her sites for a year. She was responsible for the majority of the hatred expressed in the comments section while the board was down in September. DD was sounding pretty much exactly like her too. After what I've been through that perception is not out of line or far-fetched, and indeed, it was obviously shared by others. DD and Filed were not posting from the same IP as claimed. Frankly, given what I learned from other survivors this summer about some other posters here, anything is possible.

There were no deleted ‘tag-teamed attacks’. The deleted posts had nothing whatsoever to do with you; again, as Free already stated, after she (rightly) challenged the wisdom of posting potentially sensitive, personal experiences and after some consideration, I edited some posts and deleted others. Brigit later deleted hers, for, as I recall, much the same reason, then she pretty much exited the board.

Yes, there were deleted attacks, here's one right here: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=25544&p=293914#p293914
Notice my post directly after yours, hard to imagine I was replying to nothing there.

And it was I, not Free, who warned against personal sharing which took place long after the thread in which you and Brigit went on about me being a sociopath. Here is the link:
viewtopic.php?f=8&t=25789&p=299472&hilit=personal+sharing#p299472

Please provide a link because I didn’t see that post either. Knowing DD as I do, I’m certain she doesn’t consider DID a ‘hoax’.

Right here: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=28500&p=343886#p343886

What a shame that not only are MC survivors disbelieved, discredited and marginalized, but so are their children, many of whom are also deeply impacted.
On the other hand, I don’t, and hope they don’t, take it personally. RI can’t be a safe venue for survivors. No place is, IMHO.

I don't know who you are or what you've done for or with survivors. My record, which is 20 years long, is fairly public. You and Free and anyone else who has an issue with me here on this board have a choice. You can approach me with respect to the particular context I've described and as a well-intentioned person, or you can cease to approach me altogether. I will not tolerate you berating me or attacking my character in any way. I hope I've made myself clear.

[barracuda]

Okay, now that everyone's had a crack at it, could any further responses take place in Delta Dawn's thread? It would be pleasantly appreciated.

Thanks in advance,

signed,

your friendly facilitator,

b

[nathan28]

By the way - a toast to c2w?. You are missed.

I hadn't realized she'd left, but I wasn't paying attention. We all run out of patience eventually. I'll pay for the toast.

[semper occultus]

...& where the hell's 8bit these days...?

[Brigit]

barracuda wrote: "Okay, now that everyone's had a crack at it, could any further responses take place in Delta Dawn's thread? It would be pleasantly appreciated.

Thanks in advance,

signed,

your friendly facilitator,

b"

Only because I was mentioned in the recent discussion, I really need to defend myself and would like to explain why I deleted my entries on the MC/Delusion thread that has also been referred to here. I will respond in Delta Dawn's new thread. Thank you.
Brigit