10 Random Facts

[erosoplier]

I wasn't in any way, shape or form accusing you of narcissism. The story about Narcissus was merely an especially graceful device to explain the nature of love itself, whether eros or any other kind (even 'in love'). Nothing to do with narcissism. It's all about what love is.

I guess I still don't quite understand what you meant, Alice, but perhaps I should learn to leave some space for mystery, because I seem to have turned this delightful thread into something of an ordeal.

Sorry about that.

[sw]

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[AlicetheKurious]

erosoplier said:

I guess I still don't quite understand what you meant, Alice, but perhaps I should learn to leave some space for mystery, because I seem to have turned this delightful thread into something of an ordeal.

Sorry about that.

Hardly an ordeal, erosoplier, and no need to be sorry.

As for understanding things, there's another parable in "The Alchemist", about the wisest man in the world, that I didn't understand until years after I'd read it, so I can relate.

The book is deceptively simple, but the wisdom it contains is very complex and profound.

sw, I get the feeling that you've spent years trying to unravel the mystery of your childhood. How much of it have you figured out?

[sw]

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[sunny]

sw, you should be very proud of yourself for having accomplished so much with what you have been through. Kudos to you, dear lady!

[Hugh Manatee Wins]

.....
7. Some of my best friends are dogs.

.....

I knew a few people who were disappointed or traumatized by people early in life who rely on the kindness and companionship of animals either mostly or atleast regularly, perhaps as compensation or as deliberate choice.

I make it a point to enjoy other people's dogs when I'm in public. Very honest, they are.
I keep seeing bumper stickers that say "Less bark, more wag."

Seems the pack knows times are tough and we all need to look out for each other more.

[sw]

Thanks, Sunny!

Yes, I agree about animals, too, Hugh. They have been a godsend in so many ways. They begin each day with such vigor. Every walk is an adventure. They love with deep abandon.

[§ê¢rꆧ]

1) My parents are dead and I miss one of them terribly. I dream about her often and want to believe her soul survives, somehow, somewhere.

2) From the ages of about 4 to 8 I had an Imaginary Friend named Marky. I cannot recall what he 'looked' like but I remember the somewhat eerie, hair-raising feeling I got when he was around, I remember a certain way the wind would blow the brush and bushes, and this is how I would know he was there. I remember exactly how it felt. There was a certain place by the railroad tracks where we lived that I would find him. I don't remember what he 'sounded' like, but I have the sense that he talked to me - I just can't remember what he said all these years later (I'm in my thirties).

Later I learned some kids had died on the tracks there around that time - and there was some theorizing about ghosts, but I haven't yet looked up the names of the children that are rumored to have died on the tracks. I know lots of kids have Imaginary Friends, and I would be interested in comparing memories of the experience.

3) When I told my father about my Imaginary Friend he told me that he was certain that demons where attacking me and that he was praying for me daily. I was a little freaked out by this. Father was a very kooky apocalyptic Christian. We had supplies of food, gold and guns for the coming of the Antichrist when I was growing up. Mother wasn't into 'that crazy shit' at all and sent me to Catholic School, for some religious 'balance' in her terms, although she wasn't Catholic, and somewhat into Urantia.

4) My parents divorced. When I was old enough to think for myself, I got into the occult. First Crowley-anity ( ), then Chaos magic (among other stops in the occult ghetto of ideas). I was recently looking through my magickal journals from this period, and realized I was pretty seriously into this stuff. It all seems somewhat alien to me now, and a part of me wants to destroy all records of it. I was doing a lot of drugs, mostly psychedelic, at this time, and I know this had a huge impact on my thinking. A part of me still believes it, and in it, but another part of me seems it wisest to just leave it alone.

5) During these wild and crazy times I went on a Journey to New Orleans for Mardi Gras, and slept in an open grave in the St. Louis cemetery there. I summoned a devil for power and found that I could not dispel him. A chance meeting with a sorceress provided me with the ablity to rid myself of him, and though I feel I gained some of his power, somehow, he does not haunt me much...

6) Alternatively, I was tripping balls on acid and awake for days on meth after driving to New Orleans, and met a creepy street hustler who taught me how to hustle up the cash I needed to get back home. He got kinda weird on me and wouldn't let me leave him - wouldn't even let me out of his sight. He also made very frightening innuendos about murders that he was involved in. He looked a little like Charlie Manson, and his name was "Spider." I have photos of him still. It was only by meeting a very kind, beautiful and somewhat indulgent stranger who agreed to pretend that I was going to have sex with her was I able to ditch the bastard. It was the only way I could get out from under his watchful gaze for even a moment.

7) I turned a trick in New Orleans, the only time in my life. I didn't end up really having much sex with the guy so I am not sure if it counts. I gave him a good backrub, but couldn't get into him. Either it was all the drugs, or he just was too old and not my type and I couldn't get hard ... but he paid me anyhow as we agreed. I'm bisexual, but mostly hetero. There have been times that I really wanted to be gay and have tried.

I've been seriously in love three times in my life. I think third time is the charm and I hope it lasts forever.

9) Once, I almost died on Halloween, when a kid (I swear he must have been 14) dressed as "The Scream" brandished a weapon in a dark alley, and explained I was to die so he could be initiated into his gang. He was dead serious. Somehow, I talked my way out of that one... I will never forget the feeling, though.

10) I think the Rigorous Intuition board is the most fascinating online community I have ever been to. I have aspired to write for a long time, and have written much incomprehensible fiction, some poetry and many forget-able review, puff journalism pieces. I'm a fan of Jeff Wells' writing style and find it inspiring. These days I mostly make a living making small, custom web sites for small businesses and individuals. I think I'm rambling now, so that's 10 things, that's me. Some of my secrets.

[sunny]

§ê¢rꆧ, re your # 9, wow! terrifying, as is your #6.
I had imaginary friends too up until about age 8, but that's a whole 'nother thread.

[vigilant]

1. I learned how to ride a unicycle at the age of 10, and I can still ride the hell out of it. I once crashed a 5K run and rode my unicycle in the run. The officials were not amused. I had a huge blue and gold Macaw (parrot) named Marvin. I would put Marvin on my shoulder and ride all over town. When people asked what the hell I was doing, I told them I was in the circus.

2. As a response to an unhappy marriage, I was a raging alcoholic for 4 years of my early life. I was also smoking tons of dope and taking speed. When my wife left, I took my 12 guage shotgun and blew all the furniture in the house to pieces. It was very liberating and a hell of a lot of fun.....until the next morning when I woke up and saw what I had done. I discovered that I had also lined up all the pots and pans on the kitchen floor and shot holes through the bottoms of them, and the floor of course..........My dog "Bo" .(australian Shepard) and I got arrested and taken to jail 4 times for public intox. Bo is the only dog I know that has been to jail 4 times. Once my wife came and picked Bo up from jail, and left me in jail..... The cops said, "your wife called and asked if she could come and pick up the dog, and she didn't mean you"...as they laughed hysterically. I didn't drink for years afterwards........

3. As a child I found a cat in a garbage bin near death. I picked him up and rode 12 miles on my bicycle to the veterinarian to have him treated. My mother wouldn't let me keep him. I kept him hidden in a cabinet and then found him a home after he recovered. When I was younger I had a pet opossum named Herman and a pet Raccoon named Lester. Lester was the neighborhood burglar and he broke into peoples house and stole things. I almost got arrested for Lester's behavior. Lester was later executed by an angry neighbor.

4. A few years ago I had what most people call a spontaneous Kundalini awakening, or spiritual awakening. Reality became completely unfiltered by all human perspective, definition, and description. I was able to see the world, its people, nature, and the universe in raw form. I could see far into the infared spectrum light, and still can sometimes. It lasted for about 1 1/2 years. I was completely insane yet totally sane at the same time. Wild animals like squirrels would walk right up to me, seemingly without any fear. My body radiated heat similar to what Tibetian Monks can do when meditating (melt snow around their body) and the floor would be hot for three feet around my body if I sat in one place very long. I could see bright flashes of light in the atmosphere. The top of my skull would also literally vibrate at times. My body knocked out electronic appliances, caused them to malfunction, blew out light bulbs when I got near them, caused cell phones to come through televisions, etc...I felt like I could see other dimensions of time, space, and nature. My vision was somewhat ultra 3D and the sky looked like an ocean. My wife fled the house, she was terrified. I was a typical Republican type before it happened, but I was stripped of my ego during this event, or it died....or something. Sometimes I thought I could even hear it whimper as it died. I started with a blank slate (ego wise), more or less, after it happened. When it was finally over I traveled all the way to the other side of the country and hung out with a bunch of Pagans for several months...coolest people I ever met...I then wandered the country for two years, and I then studied every religion on the planet, read Terrence Mckenna, Carlos Castenada, etc...et.al. I don't care for Republicans anymore...I am now comfortable with paradox...I don't need absolutes anymore. I faced my own death.....For a few weeks I thought I was dead, and just didn't know it yet. I went insane, to become sane........

added on edit: This is a dangerous thing to do both mentally and physically. I have permanent physical damage from this experience on the left side of my body. Damaged cranial nerves in the left side of my head and face from trying to withstand all the energy. This can kill you or maim you for life. Tread very carefully with it...

5. When I was in college I was arrested for throwing furniture out of the third story window,into the swimming pool, and then jumping from the window myself....naked.....
(but it was fun) When I was 12 years old I put some cat shit in a sack, put it on my neighbors doorstep, lit the sack on fire, rang the door bell, and ran and hid. Nobody was home. Their house caught on fire.

6. I got drunk at a rodeo one night. When the rodeo was over and everybody left I went to the bull pens. I spent a couple of hours jumping from the top fence onto the bull's backs trying to ride them. Everytime I got thrown off I went face first in a foot deep muck of bullshit and mud. I was covered with bullshit from head to toe. A friend of mine came and found me and talked some sense into me, otherwise I would have ended up getting stomped to death in the pen, and its a wonder I didn't get killed.

7. I come from a broken home. Still to this day when I watch movies depicting family members showing affection for one another, it makes tears well up in my eyes.

8. There is something about the strong types abusing the weaker types that really pisses me off. I have been in a lot of fist fights in my life in an effort to protect the weak from the strong. I was almost beaten to death by 6 assholes in Nashville, TN. on night for doing this. I usually root for the under dog.

9. After using an ear candle, and then opening up the ear candle to see what came out of my ear, I discovered what looked exactly like the face and head of a man. I put it in a small box. Months later I took it out of the box. The wall in the house made an ear splitting, loud, cracking noise at the instant I took it out of the box. It scared the shit out of me. I wrapped the box in yep..."tin foil" and I am still scared to open it up.

10. In earlier life.....It was my last night at my apartment. I was moving to another town. I was partying with some friends at my going away party. I didn't have room for my bed frame and bed mattress in my truck. I drug the bed out into the parking lot. I doused it with kersosene and set it on fire. Ever seen a bed mattress burn? Oh mannn....that was a pretty big fire. When the fire department came I stood around with the rest of the onlookers and pretended to be a spectator.

[sunny]

7. I come from a broken home. Still to this day when I watch movies depicting family members showing affection for one another, it makes tears well up in my eyes.

{{{{{{vigilant}}}}}}

[Hugh Manatee Wins]

.....
7. I come from a broken home. Still to this day when I watch movies depicting family members showing affection for one another, it makes tears well up in my eyes.

8. There is something about the strong types abusing the weaker types that really pisses me off. I have been in a lot of fist fights in my life in an effort to protect the weak from the strong. I was almost beaten to death by 6 assholes in Nashville, TN. on night for doing this. I usually root for the under dog.
....

What's that bell I just heard?
I think 7 & 8 might be related for a quite a few of us.

We're social animals. It has to happen somewhere, ay?

Fascinating, vigilant. Thanks.

[OP ED]

18

[barracuda]

1. I am one of those "Street light interference" people, or SLIders, who put out streetlights as they walk by them. There is absolutely no way it is a coincidence.

2. I contracted spinal meningitis at 9 years of age and still vividly remember the hallucinations of floating jabbering multicolored gnomes as I vomited my guts out before receiving the first of two spinal taps. I have enjoyed the priviledge of non-stop waking hallucinations ever since.

3. I was president of my high school class.

4. I am a drug addict, have been since I was about 16, did county time several times for possession, under the influence and other drug-related crimes.

5. I was attacked by two sixty-pound rotweiler/doberman mix guard dogs during a misunderstanding at a drug deal. One went for my ass, the other for my throat in a focused coordinated attack which lasted all of five seconds and left me bloodied and scarred. The dog at my neck was actually hanging off of my jawbone, writhing his whole body to get a piece when the owner said the control word and they laid off. I am now and forever a cat-person.

6. I am an Eagle Boy Scout.

7. I was badly beaten by a large part of the San Jose State University football team for very good reason, and only escaped by hiding under an automobile where their huge arms could not reach.

8. I once stood naked except for a sock on my penis with four other people in front of W. Clement Stone and his entourage of elderly hotties.

9. I am a native San Franciscan, born in S.F. General. My parents lived on Asbury street in the Haight until 1959, 'cause my dad was a jazz fan. When our neighbor painted a purple eyeball on his front door, they moved.

10. I haven't owned a t.v. for 25 years. What a joy!

[vigilant]

barracuda wrote:

1. I am one of those "Street light interference" people, or SLIders, who put out streetlights as they walk by them. There is absolutely no way it is a coincidence.


Same thing was happening to me when I went through my Kundalini experience I described above. At first I thought it must be a coincidence but it just kept happening over and over and over. I researched this and Kundalini , and found that many other people also reported that sodium vapor lights (street lights) would suddenly go out when they got near them. I have no idea why some people can knock out a sodium vapor light with their presence, but so many people have reported this....that I can only assume it to be true......for whatever reason....