rigorousintuition.ca

Simulist wrote:Hi Barracuda,

I posted this, but then decided to delete it because I wasn't sure that I really wanted to start the shit-storm that might ensue.

There's something very WRONG about that "Black Assassins" site — something that may not be just the obvious.

In other words, I may smell a Rat.

Simulist

Because I've preferred to talk about Tiger Woods — and not head down the side streets that seem almost inevitable in any online discussion about mind control — I've been hesitant to engage in the "Black Assassins" sub-topic. But since it seems unavoidable, I will.

I agree with Barracuda on this completely; moreover, there is something disturbingly familiar about some of the material I've seen there to resurrect some old (but familiar) feelings of dread. In fact, if the banned poster, "OneSmartRat" had known how to spell and had understood the rudiments of English grammar better, I'd seriously wonder if he, she, or they might be involved with it.

As it is, there is enough toxic crap mixed in with whatever sound information is there to discredit the entire topic for many people.

And that's a too-familiar tune, certainly.

Thanks for your reply – and no apologies necessary. I understand what it’s like to deal with people who are not who they say they are, and I want nothing whatsoever to do with any of them – most especially, DreamsEnd. So, for that reason, I’d like to explain to you who I am, what brought me to your website, and why I stopped posting as “Eldritch” if you can bear with me.

I became interested in Whitley Strieber back in the 1980s because I’ve lived my whole life with extremely vivid childhood memories very similar to the ones described in his book, Communion and later, The Secret School. Now, I don’t want to just gloss over that last sentence, because for people who have actually lived with such bizarre memories since they were children… well, something like that can pretty well get under a person’s skin. It got under mine, Jeff, and I needed desperately to get it out.

In fact, much of my life has been an effort to understand this. That’s the reason I majored in theology in college and grad school — not because of “UFOs” (I didn’t even associate the things I saw as a child with “UFOs” or their occupants as they’re classically understood, and I still don’t), but because my child’s mind conceived of the beings I saw as being connected somehow to “personified evil” and the clarity of those memories drove me to try to understand what this might actually be about. Since then, I’ve stepped away from organized religion, but not from the quest to comprehend this.

At a certain point, I came to consider the possibility that Strieber – indeed the whole effort to characterize this subject in terms of “extraterrestrial visitation” – was a tool of misdirection, rather than illumination.

And, unfortunately, that’s where DreamsEnd comes somewhat into the picture.

I met a person online who was promoting DreamsEnd’s material — and since, as I’ve mentioned, I also had “Secret School” sorts of experiences as a child concurrent with whatever these “Communion” experiences really were, I was naturally and immediately very interested in this unique take on things. In short, I wound up getting involved with some of these people, and later constructing a private message board as a safe place for my new “friends” and me to “debrief” about all of this – and that’s when things began to get very, very strange.

This became a period in my life that I’m not eager to repeat. or even revisit. Months later now and I still don’t really know who these people are that I’d gotten involved with – except to know that much of it was bullshit. Was this one of those “alternate reality games” that DreamsEnd talked so much about? Were some of these folks actually “intel people” of some kind? I didn’t really know; I still don’t, and probably never will. All I know is that I wound up getting played by a few people who were extremely good at what they did, interested in getting whatever information they could out of me while offering little particularly substantive in return, and then vanishing in a huff when at last I began to get suspicious.

Since at least a couple of these people regularly read Rigorous Intuition, I haven’t been eager to become visible to them again as “Eldritch,” so when I couldn't get the account to work, I took the opportunity to choose another username, “Simulist,” as I mentioned to you when I registered. I’m not a spiteful person, nor am I a game-player — I’d just prefer not to be too conspicuous to people I’d prefer to leave well and alone.

You have a wonderful board, Jeff — and it isn't an exaggeration to say that it's also important. The uniqueness of its subject matter, the intelligence of so many of its posters, and the variety of "trolling interests" that such a combination can sometimes attract has me feeling a degree of amazement that you have managed to keep your sanity all this time. I hit the "ABORT" button on the small, private forum I mentioned to you before (the one where "OSR and Friends" had been participants) while I could still credibly convince myself that my sanity remained intact.

Weirdness abounded. Some of the time I thought I'd figured it out, only to find a new twist in the road.

Bottom line: the revolving screen name carousel can be a pretty convincing illusion, but even the best magicians can give themselves away, if they're not careful. A certain "turn of the phrase," a telltale habit of punctuation (and quite a few other "patterns" and giveaways) can raise red flags — but even there, the frustrating part is that it's difficult to "prove" anything.

And sometimes, even if you can, exactly what does it all mean?

Early on, for example, I had an exchange of emails with whomever it was who wore the mask of OneSmartRat (and I'm by no means assuming or implying that this was just one person, by the way). It was a cordial exchange — as long as it was OSR asking the questions. S/he was interested in my "Secret School" sorts of experiences as a youngster, and appeared even to "evolve" her story to put herself at the same locations and times in the Bay Area that this happened when I was a small boy. The problem was of course that s/he gave herself away in the details — s/he could not have been there for example, and not known "X," "Y," or "Z." She appeared to be trying to "lead" me into thinking that the scientist in charge of our group was Josef Mengele. (Jeff, it was not Josef Mengele.) But I listened, and I let her go on and on, sincerely wondering by now where all of this was leading. Where it led was pretty much where I expected it to lead: with someone clearly trying to lead me. When OSR realized that the red flags s/he'd raised were reaching critical mass, s/he created such a scene on the board that s/he was banned. By LilyPat.

And then LilyPat proceeded to pick up right where OSR had left off. (Let me hasten to add that I really do not know if LilyPat did this by intention, but she certainly did this by function. In other words, I really don't know the degree of culpability involved. Or maybe for some reason I'd still like to believe in her. At least just a little.) LilyPat and Brighid_Moon (also Maddy on your board) worked as a team. Both of them appeared to believe their pretense was working effectively until I decided to ask Brighid_Moon if it ever had seemed curious to her that LilyPat was the only person ever to have actually "met" OSR. (That's really quite a little factoid, if you think about it much.)

And then all hell began to break loose. Only later did I learn that a behind-the-scenes PM assault had been started then, wherein LilyPat undertook to convince other board members that I had been "programmed" to destroy the message board. (I'd heard of "programmed assassins" before, but I would have at least hoped that any latent "Jason Bourne-ness" in me might have been put to better — or at least more interesting — use. This was quite a let down.) Of course I was the psychopathic villain, LilyPat was the victim... And, well, you know the drill.

Once LilyPat's fear (or now perhaps greatest hope, as it had begun to appear to me and to several others) had been realized — the message board being no more — I really didn't want too much to do with message boards for a while. (I wouldn't say the experience had PTSD'd me, but I would say that the it had sucked. A lot.) So it was pretty interesting when one of the members on our old board, Partyghost (Peartreed on yours), who hadn't posted for more than nine full months at RI, suddenly started posting within 24 hours of a post I made (as Simulist) in "Intelligence Community Child Abuse on Dreamland." That's "proof" of nothing, but it was a little weird.

Here's my question to you, Jeff. Is it possible that some of the people we've been seeing come and go — and then reappear again, under a new screen name — have the ability to spoof IP addresses? Maybe even MAC addresses? Long before all hell broke loose on our former board, I had begun to suspect that some of the people posting there were in fact the same people posting under other screen names, even though their IP addresses appeared different.

Like you, we used Bluehost. Not long after I began wondering about the IP spoofing question, I turned on the logging functions for the web site in the main Bluehost control panel. I wanted to see if there might be any correlation between certain "patterns" in poster behavior vs. any patterns of access by IP address. Initially, I didn't notice anything. But as the months wore on, I decided to look back at those compiled statistics, month by month. And I did notice something: missing logs, corresponding to very specific days in the life of the board. (Like, for example, when LilyPat appeared to become so paranoid that she accused the entire board population of conspiring against her. That log was missing. Vanished. Gone.) There were several such incidents, each with missing logs. When I asked the tech representative at Bluehost if he could tell me how this might have happened, he said he didn't know. Neither did his supervisor when I asked to speak to him.

Very strange. So I'm brought back to my "haunted house" analogy. It's like being blindfolded — and maybe even when you think you're not.

Yes, to answer your question, there are a number of relatively new posters I've wondered about. (Rothmans most cartoonishly, but others also. This list is by no means an exhaustive one: 17breezes, Cordelia, Brigit — which sounds uncomfortably close to both Bridge It and Brighid_Moon. And isn't it striking how so many of them make their way to threads about MKULTRA and mind control? A little unnerving, too, if you asked me.)

I can prove — beyond a shadow of a doubt — that I have suspicions. Not exactly an accomplishment, nor even significant necessarily. But I've offered a few of them here, along with the admission of course that I really can't prove much. Nevertheless, I'm happy to answer whatever other questions you may have.

To this day, I still do not know exactly what to make of LilyPat — even after all that time — I certainly have had my "suspicions" (and I expressed some of them to you here and some of my reasons for them), but "suspicions" are nothing upon which I would want someone's character destroyed. If it turns out that she is a sincere person and has somehow been wrongly influenced in some way — or if this has somehow been a terrible misunderstanding (although I can't imagine exactly how that might be) — then it would simply be wrong of me to allow my suspicions to go beyond our exchange in a way that would undermine her character.

barracuda wrote:Wow. That certainly is a fascinating tale. Yet another piece in the puzzle that is LilyPat.

Peregrine and I met her in Seattle. I found her to be exactly like her posting style - chatty, rather boringly so, and very matter-of-factly inserting references to her various alters in a casual manner, as if this were an utter commonplace. So much so that I have to say I began to take her speil with a grain of salt.... She is a tiny, thin woman with long blond hair and bangs, about sixty years old, I would guess, and if she is really behind much of this stuff, I stand somewhat in awe of her very strong kung fu. I have a feeling the Bird Lady will have a somewhat different take on her, though.