The World's Weirdest/Stupidest Conspiracy Theories

[slimmouse]

People who deny the exsistence of conspiracies altogether puzzle me. Did we not learn anything from the Church Commitee report? What about COINTELPRO? Or Watergate? Or Iran/Contra? Or Operation Paperclip? Or MK-ULTRA? Or Tuskegee Institute? Or Operation Gladio? Or the Pentagon Papers?

I find the whole "conspiracy theory" meme, to be a classic example of how the Global elite have found yet another way to take the piss ( an english metaphor for making the fool) out of those who know what theyre playing at.

I mean youve really gotta hand it to these guys in spades.

A Conspiracy theory, by mainstream definition, would be one based upon preposterous assumptions, and way out there logic, as opposed to the "official" story - which is of course nuttin but the facts !




And yet, we have the 9/11 "official story" , where we are expected to believe ( amongst many other diabolical claims) that;

* having pulled off the "surprise attack of the century, which took both the US military, and the intelligence agencies completely by surprise - some 36 hours later , these people have 19 names of the culprits on a piece of paper, and are half way on their way to Afghanistan !

* 2 planes hit 2 buildings , whereupon not only 2, but 3 buildings collapse. Having collapsed of course, the black boxes and flight recorders, which are both satellite traceable, and virtually indestructible are lost forever. And yet, conveniently landing at the feet of some dude is a terrorists passport from one of the planes.

* The above event having come to pass, what happens now is, that a third plane, piloted by a complete aeronautical incompetent, who cant get insurance to fly a biplane, manages to find its way back to washington, from 45 minutes away,( evading detection by USAF) locate the pentagon, and then complete a 7000 ft descent in 2 minutes, incorporating a 270 degree turn at 500 mph , five feet off the ground, before hitting the part of the Pentagon, where the "enemies of Islam" DONT happen to be !.

* The leader of this brave bunch of Allah-intoxicated warriors, Mohammed Atta, is a coke snorting, alcohol drinking, strip club frequenting gambler.

And then of course, we have Dubya and his crowd, ' Avin a laff ' at us all, with the now famous speech at the UN.

" We must speak the truth about terror. Let us never tolerate outrageous conspiracy theories concerning the attacks of September 11. Malicious lies that attempt to shift the blame away from the terrorists, away from the guilty."

If this wasnt so fucking sick, one could do little but admire how this whole "conspiracy theory" meme has been twisted in our direction.

And of course the UN quote, can simply take its place, in a list of subsequent sick quotes at the expense of humanity.

Im thinking for instance of the chimp looking under his table for Iraqs WMDs. Not to mention his SOTU speech that preceded this performance

Or perhaps his "I cant wait to hang it" jibe at the presentation of the MLK photograph.

et cetera, et cetera.

So Noen. There really are conspiracies out there. And as someone smart enough to find this very place, Im frankly perplexed by your opinions

[noen]

If you dont like the forum then fucking leave, what is the point of being an asshole?

Maybe, just maybe, you'll wake the fuck up. And if it was just you I wouldn't give a shit but it isn't just you. You infect others with your lies and psychotic delusions. You hurt other people and that is just wrong. And finally because reasoning with you gets nowhere. A thousand years from now you will still be going on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on about this shit.

You are mentally ill. Hugh believes he can do what no one has ever done. Hugh can read minds and knows what his projected phantoms intend. Slimmouse believes in David Ikkes reptilians hook, line and sinker. And so it goes on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on.

So what's your diagnosis? I bet most of you have a psychiatrist and have meds you should be taking right? What is the preferred anti-psychotic these days huh? (Zyprexa? Geodon?) YOU NEED TO START TAKING THEM. And when was the last time you were hospitalized? Again, I bet most of you have been at one time or another.

Maybe you should check in again, the world would be better off if you did.

[MASONIC PLOT]

Whatever, dude.


I am not exactly sure what shit we are going on and on and on about. It is pretty obvious that politicans are corrupt and the world is all fucked up because of their incompetence. What dont you understand about that?

[theeKultleeder]

I've heard this kind of bashing before. The guy is filled with hate and confusion and decides to, what, save us from ourselves? Instead of behaving like a rational human being and engaging in meaningful dialogue he can only heap scorn and abuse upon the other forum members.

In a newsreader you could just put a filter on the guy and be done with him. He certainly isn't going to act as the voice of reason here. I guess one could just try to ignore him.

[sunny]

noen, seriously. I know the stuff we discuss here can be incredibly depressing and can lead to feelings of hopelessness. (I am talking here about the real and documented horrors that go on in the world)I have felt that way myself at times. I think you should consider getting offline for a very long time and getting back to the basics of life. I think that is good advice for anyone experiencing depression about the fucked up world. Just go and love your family and friends and don't worry about the crap for a while.

[slimmouse]

Probably about the most scary moment of my life, was when I actually realised that the 19 Arabs crappola was just that.

It was like someone had just reached into my chest and ripped my heart out.

Initially what was worse for me, was not realising that the whole official conspiracy theory was a lie, but that I now knew this

Not a nice moment for any supposedly "educated" dude at the age of 40.

But Noen how it is, is how it is, and no length of Egyptian river ( De nile) is gonna change that.

Time to stand up and be a man/ woman is my best advice

[mentalgongfu2]

Noen, didn't your Momma ever teach you if you don't have anything nice to say . . . Don't say anything at all? That being said, I have nothing else to say to you.

[jingofever]

What is the preferred anti-psychotic these days huh?

Diazepam.

[Nordic]

Probably about the most scary moment of my life, was when I actually realised that the 19 Arabs crappola was just that.

It was like someone had just reached into my chest and ripped my heart out.

I like to tell people it's like the moment, when you were a kid, when you realized Santa Clause was a fake.

(and if you think about it, the whole Santa Clause thing was indeed a conspiracy -- a conspiracy of your parents, weathermen, shopping malls, the guys who dress up like him, the entire "Christmas industry")

That's something everybody remembers. Everybody can relate.

That's how it felt for me. Because once you realize Santa doesn't exist? There's no going back.

And the response of people who STILL believe the "official story" is every bit as emotional as that of a small child who says "YES THERE IS TOO A SANTA CLAUSE!"

The world has devolved into a child's fantasy world. Where we're still winning a lost war, there are boogeymen around every corner, and an AD IN A NEWSPAPER is condemned by BOTH HOUSES OF CONGRESS.

Where are the damn grownups in the world?

[FourthBase]

(and if you think about it, the whole Santa Clause thing was indeed a conspiracy -- a conspiracy of your parents, weathermen, shopping malls, the guys who dress up like him, the entire "Christmas industry")

Your conspiracy theory re: Santa isn't even remotely plausible, there's no way that many people could keep a secret like that, somebody would have spilled the beans at some point. And the number of people that would need to be involved in your conspiracy is astronomical -- not just the corporations who benefit from a Santa conspiracy but also teachers and news anchors and department store clerks and even your own parents...thousands upon thousands upon thousands and maybe millions of of people, people with no discernible interest in protecting the conspiracy. Seems like it's just a grandiose scenario in the collective imbalanced psyche of you and your friends [/debunker]

[H_C_E]

Why is anyone even responding to this guy? Really now, it's exactly what he wants. Let him rant and make noise. Who is he really hurting with his song and dance? Besides, he's angry for a reason. What that reason is, I don't know, but if he goes on long enough he'll reveal his unconscious M.O.

Myself, I find the old boy a bit of a hoot. He's like a dog and pony show, without the dog or pony.

And remember, for the straight poop, go where I go every morning. Centrally located and just a stones throw from the tomb of the unregistered voter.

HCE

[sunny]

Fourthbase, we believe in the massive Santa conspiracy because it's such a comfort to believe even our parents would lie to us.

H_C_E, in a way noen raises a good topic for discussion-what para-subjects are worth our while and what should be ignored, and how exactly do we determine the difference?

[8bitagent]

He thinks that even if the landing itself wasn't faked, the photos might have been, because the authentic photos might not have been that, well, photogenic.

A lot of people start off believing in Moon Hoax then it gets watered down to some convoluted idea like this. I don't get why people need it to be at least a bit fake. I guess it's to try and avoid admitting they were totally wrong... hanging onto at least a little bit of it.

In this case, I don't get why anyone would need to think that the authentic photos would be no good. I mean, it's basically very easy to take good photos of pretty much anything with a little practice. If you're ON THE MOON then your photos are gonna look pretty amazing because they're PHOTOS OF THE MOON!

They did Masonic rituals on the moon. Why would they do Masonic rituals on a fake moon set? When the film Shadow of the Moon comes out on dvd, they'll see that the "moon landing was a hoax"....is, a hoax

[Joe Hillshoist]

Noen, the Donald Homes conspiracy re ww2 was a fictional novel. Everything else on your list is true, you clown.

BTW The Santa Conspiracy was brilliantly summed up in a terry Pratchet book called Hogfather. (Well not the Koka Kola bit, the older conspiracy.)

People get taught to believe in unreal concepts like Santa, the Tooth fairy and the Easter Bunny so that when they grow up it makes it easier to believe in unreal things like honour, justice, mercy and all that.

[slow_dazzle]

Is that the forums are infested by COINTELPRO agents.

That's something I find difficult to believe.