The Incredibly Sexist Book Once Mysteriously Billed As Trump’s ‘Debut Novel’
HuffPost found ad copy for the novel, which ended up being released by Jeffrey Robinson.
When Jeffrey Robinson’s Trump Tower debuted in July 2012, it failed to receive much attention, despite boasting the tagline, “The sexiest novel of the decade,” and an endorsement from Donald Trump himself.
“Jeffrey Robinson’s novel Trump Tower bares it all,” Trump writes in the only review blurb on the the back cover. “Here is the drama of the Ultra Rich, the Ultra Powerful, and the Ultra Beautiful who call the most glamorous address in the country their home. I can’t wait to see it on television!”
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Here are just a few of the strangest sex-related scenes in Trump Tower ...
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The general manager of Trump Tower checks if a tenant named Cyndi Benson is all right in her apartment, and describes her “gorgeous breasts”:
Slowly opening the door — “Miss Benson?” — there she was, completely naked and gagged, her arms above her head, handcuffed to the top of the brass bedstead, with her legs tied to the bottom of the bedstead, stretched wide apart ... “Miss Benson ...”
Later in that scene:
Although she’d lately added blonde mesh highlights to her dark hair, her big, hazel eyes were the same as when they helped to make her famous, and her high cheekbones were the same, and her legs were the same but, as Belasco had already discovered — being two or three pounds heavier than she’d been as a teenager — she now had absolutely gorgeous breasts.
A tenant named Ricky walks out of his bedroom and orders a stranger to have sex with him:
Just then, Ricky heard some noise down the hall. He followed it to the second bedroom, opened the door, and saw a naked guy on top of a naked girl. He didn’t know either of them. “Oy.” The guy looked over but didn’t stop. “Hey Ricky, I’m Bugs. She’s Shari.” “Don’t mind me.” Ricky stood there. Shari looked up, half-waved, and brought her feet up. “Pleased to make your acquaintance.” He watched them for a moment, then stepped into the room and got into bed with them. “When you’re done with him, luv,” Ricky said to Shari, “you get on top of me. Just be careful this bleeding ankle bracelet don’t leave no marks.”
An elevator operator talks about his newborn child with a tenant and says, “He like his mama’s titties a lot”:
Jaquim pulled a photo out of his pocket and showed it to David. “Seven kilos already. That’s the clothes you and Mrs. Cove bought for him. He like a lot.” “Seven kilos. Good.” David had no idea if that was good or not, but he knew he had to say something nice. Jaquim pointed to his chest and nodded, “He like his mama’s titties a lot.”
Later in that scene:
David mumbled, “I’d probably like his mama’s titties, too,” and, instead of using his key, he rang the bell.
A Hollywood agent named Zeke talks to Katie Couric at a party and brings up something Trump told him about the “absolutely gorgeous girls” he used to have sex with:
“That’s what Trump wanted to know when I mentioned the deal to him. You know what I told him?” “What?” “I said, ‘Donald, when you own the world, you get laid a lot.’” Couric looked at him askance. “And you know what he said to me?” Zeke nodded several times, “He said that when he was single and running around with some of the most beautiful women on the planet, absolutely gorgeous girls, he used to get laid all the time. He said, ‘Zeke, I didn’t have to own the world.’ And I said to him, Donald, of course not, because you already owned the air rights.” Couric smiled politely.
Two female tenants talk about getting lunch and wonder if they’ll be able to keep their clothes on:
“Ladies who lunch,” Cyndi said. “This time,” Alicia suggested, “let’s try to keep our clothes on.”
A lingerie designer talking to a tenant about his goals:
As Firenzi himself described it once to Carson, “I create underwear for the whore that every man prays his mistress might become.”
A friend of Ricky’s gifts what he thinks is a cat:
“Open it,” King said. “We found it in the neighborhood. A stray. And I figured with you all shut up in here like this ... ” Ricky tore the box open and inside was a kitten. “Precisely what every guy needs ... a little pussy.”
An NBC News employee telling a tenant, who also works at NBC, that she will get a promotion over two white co-workers:
“Come on, you’re a shoo-in.” He reminded her, “Two white guys and a great-looking minority girl with perfect boobs? No contest.”
A married tenant named Tina decides to hook up with Ricky and some people ask if they can watch:
Then he saw Tina and smiled. “If it isn’t me visiting nurse service.” She walked up to him and grabbed his arm. “Come do me.” “What a good idea,” he said. “Don’t mind if I do.” One of the women in the living room asked, “Can we watch?” The guy next to her suggested, “Maybe we should film it.” “Fuck you,” Tina said to them and dragged Ricky back into his bedroom.
An employee of Trump Tower named Antonia talks on the phone with a Broadway actor named Tommy. Both consistently refer to themselves in third person throughout the novel:
“Take off your sweatshirt,” he said again. Her hands were trembling. “No.” “Yes,” he said. “Take off your sweatshirt. She reached for the bottom of her sweatshirt, but all she could do was hold onto it. “No.” “Yes.” “I can’t.” “Yes you can. Do as I tell you. Take off your sweatshirt.” She tried to swallow, but her mouth was totally dry. “I can’t...” “Do it. Take off your sweatshirt. Do as I tell you.” She closed her eyes, hesitated, then pulled off her sweatshirt.
“Did you do it?” “Yes.” “Now... take off your jeans...” “No...” “Yes. Take off your jeans. Go on.” Almost in a trance, she unbuttoned her jeans, opened them, and let them fall to her ankles. “What are you wearing now?” He asked. She kept her eyes shut tight and whispered, “My bra and panties.” “Now take off your bra.” Her hands were shaking as she reached behind her and did what he wanted her to do. “Yes?” He asked. “Yes,” she said and let her bra fall to the couch. “Now take off your panties.” She didn’t budge.
She moved her hands and touched herself and now her knees were so weak that she couldn’t stand up any more, and she fell onto the couch, still touching herself. He kept whispering to her, and she couldn’t stop. “Tommy...” she groaned. “Tommy… Antonia wants Tommy...” “Antonia is going to have Tommy,” he said. “Tonight. Tommy is coming to Antonia’s apartment and Tommy will ring the bell, and Antonia is going to open the door for Tommy, completely naked...”
“Yes,” she groaned. “Yes, Antonia?” “Yes... yes... completely naked.” “And do whatever Tommy wants.” “Yes.” She couldn’t stop. “Whatever Tommy wants.” “Whatever Tommy wants.” “Yes... yes,” she said it very loudly. “Whatever Tommy wants.”
A tenant named Mikey keeps convincing female guests to take off their tops:
Mikey walked up to her. “Don’t let Wendy be the only one...” “Who’s Wendy?” He pointed to the half-naked woman. “Sharon, over there.” “I thought you said her name was Wendy.” “The left one is Wendy, the right one is Sharon. What do you call yours?” Laughing, she yanked up her sweater and, bra-less, showed him a small tattoo on the side of each of her breasts. “Left ... and right.”
“How cool is that,” Mikey said, helping her out of her sweater. “Hey,” Joey objected, “this is my new girlfriend.”
“No, pal,” Mikey insisted, “this woman’s left and right belongs to the ages.” He took her hand and began parading her around the room, showing everyone her tattoos.
Later in that scene:
After the woman fell asleep, Mikey came out, looked around and saw there were at least six women not wearing tops. He proclaimed, “I’m dead. I’ve gone to boob heaven.”
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