Welcome to... The Saloon

[Maddy]

Hey, just because I'm not up to a battle doesn't mean that I don't appreciate those who are in the fray!

[Project Willow]

Uh oh, look out, because it's been a week since my last debacle (fire alarm awakening after 3:30 am bedtime!) ...I think, I might, I just might have a brew tonight before returning to battle.



...

Eh, maybe not, it's a long way yet to finishing client updates, and some other dev's code lies in my path, written by a torture-lovin', woman hatin' man, I have no doubt.

[Canadian_watcher]

Ladies, I think I might be finished here.

I cannot believe the outright abuse that's being heaped on myself and a few other women under the watchful eye of the mods who choose - instead of coming right out and calling it what it is - wait for someone to use a swear word and only then ask for civility.

I cannot believe what has been said this morning.

[barracuda]

I wish you'd come out and say what the problem is on the thread. I can't read your mind, and I don't see outright what hava has said that supercedes the rules around here. Please clarify in context.

[Canadian_watcher]

I wish you'd come out and say what the problem is on the thread. I can't read your mind, and I don't see outright what hava has said that supercedes the rules around here. Please clarify in context.

you're right, she didn't swear. God forbid that, right?

she called feminists 'crazed women' but I guess she gets off on that, too because she said she appreciates their contribution.

she called me a 'sado sista' but.. hey, there's no swearing in there!

she brought an issue from another thread - a thread where I spoke to my opposition to MALE circumcision into a thread where she knew she could be comfortable beating up on me because hey! everyone's doing it!

so yeah, you've got a dilemma on your hands.

[Maddy]

C_w I've seen Hava go off on lots of people over things that totally confuse me. Matter of fact, I think once, long long ago, she went off on me as well over ... I have no idea what now. Suffice it to say I'm not a strong person when it comes to confrontation, so I usually let things just slip past. But don't feel singled out. Despite the wrongness of cross-addressing posts from other threads, I think she just gets confused. Honestly. I saw what she wrote. It was an extension of "femi-nazi", that sado sistah remark.

I realize how hard it is to confront these things. I went through a several-years phase trying to do so. I burned out and became depressed over it. That's why I just can't fight any longer. But I do appreciate that you, and others, can and do continue! If it weren't for other women who were continuing this "battle" (gods, that it even should be a battle is insane - can I use the word "re-education"?) I'm afraid that there are men who are out there who would have us all back chained to the sink or bed. (Fact: chained to the sink or bed isn't necessarily a bad thing, as long as its your choice! ) While not quite understanding, or "getting it", sometimes, I'm relatively sure that the men here aren't those types.

Trolls are a different breed. I don't speak for them.

Norton's posting of Sinead O'Conner's video always makes me cry in its truth.

[Canadian_watcher]

the truth of the matter is that it is unfortunate that hava was the one who finally made me call out for the mods publicly.

I do feel that the misogyny thread has become a place where certain trollish posters feel they can go and just dump on me, particularly, because they can use gender-war language and obviously get away with it.

The real problem has been the systematic shutting out of the female voices by a handful of posters. You have just said that you have been burned out from it, and you are not alone in your feelings. Many, many women just won't go there.

I have continued because I can't let them bully all of us out of our own place. It was supposed to discuss misogyny, not practice it. Men - even sensitive ones - seem blissfully unaware of the tactics used against female voices. I posted an article about those dynamics but I doubt it'll make any difference.

These subtle patriarchal 'rules' are very effective, and most men - even sensitive ones - don't or won't face up to them.

[Project Willow]

These subtle patriarchal 'rules' are very effective, and most men - even sensitive ones - don't or won't face up to them.

They don't have to, they have their privileges, and sensitive or not, they still get laid, the assholes.

About RI, I have had at least two female friends question me as to how I can participate in that "Woman-hating right wing-nut CT cesspool." They say you only get one chance to make a first impression.

Hang in there women.

[Canadian_watcher]

we will hang in there. thanks, PW.

Maddy - thanks for interjecting where angels fear to tread!

[Maddy]

Lost my temper.

Don't regret it.

[Canadian_watcher]

[Project Willow]

Lost my temper.

Don't regret it.

Oh my, I've lost my cool so many times over the last 2 years, especially in ways that I'd previously be absolutely mortified to have ever done. Ah well.

[Maddy]

girls

[The Consul]

I was in the Central Tavern one night. I am real anal about cleaning my glasses and do it all the time. So I am cleaning my glasses the better to see what the problem is at the entrance where these guys are yelling at each other and there's a yell and a shove and this guy bounces off my table and gets up, grabs my linen hanky specially chosen to keep my spectacles clean and jams it in a blood spurting hole in his side. Willie, my friend, leans forward, sips his Tsing Tao and says to my ear "looks like he got it in the liver." And all hell broke loose. In my inhumanity all I could think about was my hanky I kept all those years that my nephew gave me before he died. Somehow I lost Willie and ended up in Doc Maynards where the lights were just too bright and this pretty young red head asked me if I knew where she could score some crystal. So much for downtown.
Nothing beat the bars where I grew up and the bartenders bought every 3rd or 4th beer and after a while it didn't matter how much money you had as long as you could stay on your barstool and didn't give anybody any shit. But people were always waving guns around and fighting over husbands and wives.

So I tried the late afternoons instead (to coincide with round buying beer delivery truck drivers) and that was ok for a while but it is hard to pack it in just as things start to get interesting. But after a while it is like going to the carnival only it's not fake and nobody knows what they're doing, besides falling apart. By the time I was 18 it was boring.
I only tended bar once and a guy who survived a self inflicted gunshot to the head tried to walk into the beer cooler and as I pulled him away he went into a severe grand mal seisure. The patrons were cruel, one spitting on him saying "let the fucking coward die."
I haven't drank in a bar in years, not even when my mother died and she left $400 in an envelope in the safety deposit box with a note that said have a good time, boys. Wasn't on the bar stool for 5 minutes before there were four buds and three shots in front o' me. Snuck out the back door into the cold new winter wind to wonder when, where and how I'd die, glad I wasn't thinking that on belly fired by booze.
Oddly enough my favorite bartender was a friend who became the state chairman of the John Birch Society. Only person my own age I knew who died in his sleep.

[Canadian_watcher]

Consul.. I long to understand the underlying meanings of your poetic posts.
but..
I can't.