Who the Frak are YOU: The RI Membership Directory

[peartreed]

Some of what we are is linked to our lineage, the genetic and cultural preconditioning from our array of ancestors, but most of the input to our individuality is more likely an outcome of experience and education in everyday survival. Our search for meaning through a sensory overload of information forces us to choose our own components of character with high selectivity, which, in turn, makes our traits uniquely personal and original – as a comfortable fit for our soul.

One of my grandfathers was a Spiritualist Minister who survived the trenches of WW1 and was haunted the rest of his long life by those who didn’t. His wife was a natural intuitive who made their supernatural bent seem normal to a grandson. On the maternal side the other grandfather was a railroad detective who turfed the tramps riding the rails through the Great Depression. His wife, an empath to all, died young – likely as a result of embarrassment over her husband’s autocratic occupation as a ruthless cop. She didn’t live to see him mellow out as I did.

Those quaint combinations created my stubborn, idealistic, spiritual, somewhat nonconformist parents who then inspired my inquisitive, investigative and often compulsive interest in things odd. I was born to distrust the establishment.

My arts education led into a 15-year airline career that introduced me to most of the world in person. A second 15-year career in the film industry helped me convey my creativity in action, words and pictures involving motion, emotion and devotion to adventure. My lifelong hobby was investigating the paranormal as a ghostbuster, ufologist and explorer of esoteric events outside the mainstream of society.

My Canadian upbringing included a profound appreciation of things natural, authentic and wild. That resulted in my marrying an aboriginal maiden from the Wild West. Our children and, now, our grandchildren are also a strange blend that continues to fuel my fascination with phenomenal, somewhat exceptional people.

That brought me to R.I. Other than the old, ”Hollywood Scripting” thread, I’ve pretty much confined my participation here to lurking, learning and laughing with you. For over six decades my greatest aversion remains my intolerance for overt bullshit.

[KUAN]

I was induced 10 weeks prem. My mother convinced the doctors that I was dead in the womb - or perhaps they agreed to do it to keep her from becoming psychotic.
I was blue and tiny and motionless, and a community nurse visited me at home and said ‘what the hell is this one doing out of an incubator, so I was whisked back to hospital.
My mother was away with the fairies but she read a lot and took me to meetings at the Theosophical Society from the age of 10
That set the scene for my life really. I spent most of it being withdrawn and depressed, but open to anything in the way of alternative ideas - meditation - re-birthing & etc. Nothing worked of course. Chronic depression is a hard one to shift.
That is until I tried Prozac - At first I gave up because it felt too weird (over the first 2 weeks) - and then I went back 2 years later and this time stuck it out.
The lights went on for me and I saw things in colour for the first time - no kidding.
This was age 45 - I wish that could have happened 20 years earlier so I wouldn’t have been so depressed around my kids (and all)

The 15 years since age 50 with a new partner have been a big big improvement
I’m still very much an outsider - and socially phobic - but more happy to be so
A bit manic at times, especially after a glass of red wine - you get that with prozac

The I Ching has told me more than once that being an outsider is a privilege.
I can see that now.

[BrandonD]

As someone who lives in Alabama, I find it interesting that Alabama has been almost continually represented on RI since its inception. Which other educationally, culturally and economically benighted areas of our worlds can make the same claim? Where you at, Mississippi? No, don't seem to see you here. West Virginia? Nope. North Dakota? Kentucky? That one small town in Canada that doesn't have excellent public education and health care?

I am in my late 40's and have a job. My job affords me very flexible hours and high job security, even if it doesn't pay well. I am not much of a researcher in any of the areas of interest represented on this board, but am very interested in high weirdness, deep state politics, and synchronicities generally. I wish I had known BrandonD when I lived in the city in which he resides, as he seems like a really interesting dude.

Thank you for the compliment, you used to live in H-town? Let me know if you're ever back in town, I'd love to meet and hang out face to face with any RI members, there is a scarcity of those type of people in my town.

[Dioneo]

If I'm ever back that way, I will certainly do so!

[Kristine Rosemary]

Dear elfie, I've been here almost for ever [not quite: I think the search engine shows since 2006] but changed my old username from kristinerosemary to Kristine Rosemary becos some anonymice stole all gawker passwords and ... here I am still the same not hardly posting just hit and run now and then. Love you good work xoxo

[8bitagent]

I am Cory. 36 going on 20. Long been feeling I am in the wrong geography/time/dimension/reality. I make comics, zines, music, videos, animation, performance art and writing to stay sane. I usually dress like it's 1985.
Been dirt poor most my life, rarely ever got to date, and thoroughly unhappy with the techno Truman show panopticon that's suffocating the life out of society.
But I also believe silly humor, imagination and love are the most important things in the world...so I'm not a total misanthrope downer:)

[Sounder]

BrandonD wrote…

BTW, my use of "UFO cult" is a bit tongue in cheek. I'm not branding their group as a scam, some genuinely unusual "paranormal" things occurred during that time, but as with most large groups there were questionable elements which were the motivating factor behind my departure.

‘Paranormal’ events were produced around Sai Baba, but the scam was in asserting that Baba created the trinkets rather than the ‘devotion’ of the followers creating said trinkets. We all have ‘powers’ and our mistake is in allowing ‘special’ people to claim that this ‘power’ comes through them.






peartreed wrote...

Some of what we are is linked to our lineage, the genetic and cultural preconditioning from our array of ancestors, but most of the input to our individuality is more likely an outcome of experience and education in everyday survival. Our search for meaning through a sensory overload of information forces us to choose our own components of character with high selectivity, which, in turn, makes our traits uniquely personal and original – as a comfortable fit for our soul.

When my siblings and I reminisce back on our upbringing we are always amazed at how different our perceptions were of the same events. Now imagine the variations in character produced by vastly different circumstances. Everyone has their own genius to find and have relationship with. Yet this culture produces Chicago School argumentative techniques that steps on and tries to invalidate the genius of others, leading to dull conformity.

My conditioning revolves to a certain degree around my response to my Dad and older brother, who while being ‘smart’ did stupid things. Early on I noticed that smart people spent way too much effort at convincing others as to how ‘smart’ they were.


I attended my 40 year class reunion last weekend. The school was the smallest class D school in Michigan at the time. While 28 out of 56 students in this class were together from kindergarten through to graduation, I was only there for my last two years. This was a farmer community and was somewhat anti-intellectual in its attitudes. Still, there seemed to be lots of money and a school board that hired many wonderful teachers. There were eight ‘smart’ kids in this class, and lets just say, these were not the ones that seemed to have built passably decent lives.

At dinner I sat next to ‘Sue’ who filled me in on news of various folk who I could barely place the names and faces together. (I had moved away) Then ‘Sue’ started to say some nice things about me, as my wife tried to wave her off, knowing I suppose, that ego boosts do no good for me. (One reason RI fits, very little ego boosting.)

At any rate, Sue sort of blurted out; ‘You were a genius, you were not like the other smart kids who were always trying to impress others about how smart they were, you just seemed to want to share things.’

Fittingly, my response had no markers of genius, so we can skip that.

But as I perused the yearbook I noted my ‘sig line’ that the seniors get to place as their sign out verbiage.

It was; ‘I was born a genius, since then I don’t know what happened’

Well it made me laugh anyway.

[stefano]

Thanks all for posting, especially newer members - welcome. As I mentioned five years ago (wow), I'm a South African, now 35. I moved back to Cape Town in 2010 with my Moroccan wife, and am now a father of two. I'm working as a political/economic analyst looking at North and West Africa, so work's pretty interesting. The extent to which I can work RI themes into billable research is, sadly, limited.

I'm not sure how exactly I ended up here - it probably has a lot to do with growing up white under apartheid in the 1980s, and then realising in a very direct and immediate way how governments lie and connive to maintain their control systems. I went to university when democracy was still pretty fresh, but it had become clear that the authoritarians had been wrong. There I was exposed to reading I certainly wouldn't have found about otherwise (or if I'd done a different course), especially eating up Herbert Marcuse and Erich Fromm. When Bush stole the Florida election and 9/11 happened, I think I was just ready to twig more or less what was going on, or at least to realise with absolute certainty that a lot of things were very off about the official explanation. I only started spending much time online later in that decade, and arrived at the RI blog from the defunct Who is IOZ? blog (I see now that dude's been blogging again for almost two years and has a book out - yay).

[elfismiles]

Thank you all: lurkers, regulars, and irregulars alike.

This is a rare and special place and I'm glad to get to know you, each and every one.

[MayDay]

Who the hell am I? I don't know any better than you do. There are facts, and some of them could be pertinent to the question at hand, but don't quote me on that.

I was raised by christian fundies of the pentecostal persuasion, 'Jesus People' who emerged from the murky world of drugs and rock music in the late 60's. We were a well-to-do- redneck family, like something you would see on 7th heaven, only without the molesting pastor dad, and with a lot more hunting and fishing. (my mom loves that show, and forced the whole family to watch it every wednesday? for years. I wonder how she's taking the news....)

I knew by the time I was 10 or maybe 12 years old that I was a hopeless faggot, doomed to die of aids at a young age with no sympathy from my family (thanks, 'Doctor' Dobson. May you rot in hell.) Unfortunately, I bought the christian story hook, line, and sinker. I could quote back to you sections of the old Testament you never even knew about. I was a Holy Roller, a preacher of much relevance at the age of 7. They lapped it up, the crazy adults, and I was free to sing and prophesy as I saw fit. They lapped it up like the nutters they were, and they pulled me in their poisonous wake to the so-called revival in Brownsville FL, where I was overcome by the spirit of the 'LORD'. Or, in my fucked up mythology, The Lorg Gog almighty, Ruler over all Privileged White Folk.

I sank into a deep depression at the age of twelve and never quite fully emerged from it. I floated through junior high and high school in a daze, constantly afraid that my homosexual nature would be revealed to my peers, although I put up such a hard front that this was never really a possibility. It worked perfectly- when my secret was made known, I was shunned by the very coolest of the cool- those who claimed that I was one of the coolest kids in the entire school until my secret was revealed, at which point I became a mere curiosity.

I dropped out of school at 16, having failed every class i had attended at the local public high school over the preceding three years. I spent my evenings crying in the closet of my private bathroom, the only room in the house where I could be certain that I wouldn't be overheard sobbing like a 6 year old girl. I didn't get any homework done, which accounted for 60 percent of the grade at my fucked up high school, although I generally tested above average. I was, of course, accused of cheating.

I got fat when I was subjected to public high school. I ate 2 or three slices of nasty, greasy, awesome peperoni pizza in my school's cafeteria each afternoon, followed by hours of boring, lethargic, anti-intuitive classes, when all I really wanted to do was run and play. I was 6' 1", 210 lbs when I quit school. I dropped down to a slim 155 over the next few months of absolute freedom, and I've been struggling to keep the weight on ever since (with my overactive lifestyle and emphasis on local, sustainable, organic, food, this is no easy feat).

It was pot that saved me, in the end. I was so sensitive to the stuff! A few puffs would send me into a wonderland of free association and all out, wild, hallucination.I loved it. I no longer felt guilty for crying through the hours when I was supposed to be doing homework. I reveled in my sadness, and in my visions. I embraced them until they took control. I wouldn't be where I am now were it not for that wild psychedelic ride of travel and discovery that defined my late teens and twenties, but that's another story, and one that's deeply connected to this forum.

My principles began to take shape at the beginning of the Iraq war, as I was presented with, as all of us were, the evidence that 9/11 was an inside job carried out by factions of the US govt. that wished to pursue the goal of unending war and chaos in the middle east. I trashed my car and swore that I would never drive, never purchase oil again.

Not sure anyone wants to hear more, but the next ten years are interesting, if not promising in any conventional sense.

[BrandonD]

BrandonD wrote…

BTW, my use of "UFO cult" is a bit tongue in cheek. I'm not branding their group as a scam, some genuinely unusual "paranormal" things occurred during that time, but as with most large groups there were questionable elements which were the motivating factor behind my departure.

‘Paranormal’ events were produced around Sai Baba, but the scam was in asserting that Baba created the trinkets rather than the ‘devotion’ of the followers creating said trinkets. We all have ‘powers’ and our mistake is in allowing ‘special’ people to claim that this ‘power’ comes through them.

Agreed, your comments apply 100% to my scenario.

[Sounder]

Were you a follower of Sai Baba?

Or do you mean 100% of the general point?

Thanks MayDay, that there is a lot of growth material in a relative few paragraphs.

Good work.

[BrandonD]

Were you a follower of Sai Baba?

Or do you mean 100% of the general point?

Yes to the general point, I was not a follower of Sai Baba.

But in addition to this, in my particular case it appears that the "leader" had tapped in to something of significance. At least initially.

In a a lot of these groups it seems that the leader has some initial connection with a higher reality which buys them a certain amount of legitimacy. They build an elaborate structure to capitalize on and maintain this position, which does suggest to me that they were essentially "struck by lightning" and do not expect it to strike twice.